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Monday, October 1, 2007

A Tribute to my Friends across this Planet

Friendship…..!!

What do you mean by that? There are many movies, theories and larger than life definitions by many great people about this relationship……and nobody is wrong in their own context….I’m trying to analyse what is friendship from my perception and experience…..

Before getting into the depth of it, let’s ask some preliminary questions to ourselves…..

Does Friendship start with love & affection you feel for each other?
OR
Is friendship only an acquaintance in the beginning and then evolves into a strong bond of love & affection, which prevails there forever?
OR
Is friendship based on the needs & usefulness of the individuals to each other?

Now, there could be many more (Millions of them) questions in this format, for which it might be difficult to find answers ever…..!!!!

More than 85-90% of the friendships start as mere acquaintances and then gradually evolves as a strong bondage and impression upon each other, which leads you to continue the relationship and maintain it further…..

Gradually you come across the various character patches of your friend and the impacts of the same. It is a test for your tolerance levels and you will tolerate his behaviours, depending on the willingness and character of your own self….!! You may decide to quit and still you may be half minded to offend him, purely depending on your own nature and the way your character is moulded….

According to me, after initial intimacy and getting closer, so that a bondage had happened, I do not expect my friends across this globe to contact me every time , just to say ‘hello’ and regardless of all these expressions and displays, which primarily lie in the froth level of a relation, I would like to serve my friends when they actually need me and when they come up with a request…and I expect the same from them too….Not the typical friendship day cards and those sweet chocolate words and no action of bondage….!!!

I had lost many of my friends because of this philosophy, since they all belong to the class where they had seen lot of ‘Public Display’ and they are in that trap, where you do not go beyond that level….If you do not call or meet them for 2 days, then there are lot of complaints and repercussions…!!!

I feel the friendship needs to be valued on the basis of the sacrifice one makes for his/ her friend when you are required to do it….!! Not by calling or meeting somebody regularly and when need arises, you do nothing…!

Based on my principle, I have lot many true friends and a strong networking channel of like minded friends who really care for their friends…!!

Oh…My friends …. I’m proud to be your friend.

I have other friends also who belong to the other category of glory and show off and I certainly know from my experience that they may fade away over a period of time.

Another aspect I had seen is that many of the friendships and network are with a specific agenda and goal….To me its absolutely absurd…and totally unacceptable…!!! Like mothers’ love, the friendship should be unconditional and without expectations….and should not be maintained for emotional bargains….!!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Comppletely agree with your views. I am a victim of the circumstances and hence have devised a mechanism to keep my sanity in this maddening world ..i have segmented my levels of 'friendship' in such a manner..

A lot which needs to be kep in touch with for professional gains and to avoid negative hits
Another lot in the family and community circles who need to be kept in touch with for social acceptance and sustenance..this lot is increasingly decreasing as I amnow moving into a phase mentally where meaningful relationships are more important than mere facades..

The third lot which i focus, invest time and effort in, nurture and vale is what i call the inner circle.This is totally based on invidual values and acceptance of the same in a person, whether good or bad, right or wrong. I accept them as they are and would do anything required to take the relationship to the next level consitently. This lot is purely a different lot who have no barriers & boundaries and with whom i am the most comfortable with. Some of my friends from the previous lots have moved into this lot over time and more will follow.

amen..

VK